Reminiscing Old Times

Hi hi~

I know, I know. I promised that the next post will be about my sleep over with Pavi, but things are hectic and yeah. I’ll just write about it, next time.

So, I was scrolling down my old blog because I want to convert them to PDF; for the sake of memories. I cried, I laughed, I cringed, yes, mostly cringed.

OMG! I remember that day!

Gosh, the hell was I thinking?!

I can’t believe they did that?!

Whaaaat?!!!

Wuaaaaaa!!! I miss those dorks! TT^TT

Those are some of the scenarios. One thing for sure though, I was so immature back then. Especially when it comes to my love life. Pfftt.

Like I always said, I’m screwed when Allya-the-love-struck-idiot is back. The 24/7 tomato-red Allya, submissive Allya, I-can-not-see-him-without-blushing-even-though-he-is-1-km-away Allya, the ever-so-stuttering Allya, the my-self-esteem-is-all-over-the-floor Allya. Dear God, it is so not me!

My writings, don’t get me started about my grammar.

I SUCK! BIG TIME!

My grammar is way better now, comparing to before. The qualities of those posts are terrible as well. Not to mention those photos! UGLY was tattooed all over my forehead! I want to delete them all, but knowing that my school friends like to read it sometimes (and bloody cried); I’ll just keep it for old times’ sake.

Eeeergh, I’m still cringing. How did I manage to wake up at 4 a.m. to make some packed lunch for me, hoping that Syamiel will praise my cooking?! Stupid Allya! The present Allya will even skip her exam for some sleep! What is wrong with you, young lady?! You’ll forget him in a few years time, and ended up being best buddies (more like insulting buddy).

There are those stupid school dramas. Why Allya? Why?!

Hahahahaha xD

Nevertheless, it made me who I am today. My past may not be filled with rainbows and golds, but they’re a part of me. Something that I will not trade for anything in the world. I’m thankful for those who are still with me now, but those who left; you’re still in my mind.

Tata~

 

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Moody no more~

Soooooo… I was in a bad mood, since Monday. Or was it Tuesday. Eh… I forgot… Ouh yeah, I was absent on Tuesday and Wednesday due to my high fever.

Things happened here and there. At home, campus, brain, heart. Though this one particular thing pissed the hell out of me. Though, s’all good now~

I’m still mad and I am still going to write something about it, but for now, I’m just happy. And confused. Well, more like the later one.

The one thing that I’m really bad at (except for Maths; that one is my mutual enemy since birth) is L.O.V.E. I suck big time! Make it one-sided or two ways relationship. Pffffttt… Who am I to talk? All you do is one-sided gurl xD

Let’s prevent this from getting weirder. Gotta do my law assignment (thank you Syamiel for wishing me good luck for this! I need it! TT^TT) and study for tomorrow’s quiz~

Tata~ Adios~

Becoming too ‘manja’

Who? Who became annoyingly spoilt? Tehee~ It’s me.

I am not one to ‘mengada’ with people. I don’t mind people being all clingy, acting like a baby, but for Thor’s sake; I don’t do those things. Well, at least not before.

To summarize it all, before college, I was the guardian angel/Satan’s mistress to people around me. They’ll seek me for comfort and asked for advice (tho most of the time, I’m the source of their agony), they belief in me (not trust) and most importantly, my friends know that Allya the big sister will always be there for them; to protect them.

If they got into a fight, I’ll beat up whoever the opponent was (even when my friends are wrong. Bad, I know. Am extremely bias), when someone said bad things about my friends, I’ll make sure that person who bad-mouthed them will suffer for the rest of their life (only I can talk bad about my friends) and when we’re out in the cold world, I will make sure everyone was safe. I’ll walk on the side-nearest-to-the road path, I’ll make sure I’ll be hit first when crossing the road,  I’ll bring all of those heavy things; I’ll protect them from harm’s way.

Although, it all changed when I entered college. Particularly, during my semester 2. I am treated like a princess. Maybe it’s a normal thing, but I do feel flattered by whatever they are all doing. Alhamdulillah, I’m blessed with guy friends who are total gentlemen. Never once, those male in my campus ever let me bring heavy things. They care for me like how a girl is suppose to be treated. I mean, I’m not saying that the guys from school are bad, they’re adorable, but maybe they’re just used to see me as someone who’ll protect them; not one to be protected.

Sadly, I became too comfortable with this whole situation. When I met my school friends, I get offended by what they did or said. The old Allya wouldn’t mind about it at all. Heck, she’ll probably laugh it off without feeling bad. However, the current Allya almost cried.

When facing a troublesome situation, the girl who not only collected herself, but are also leading 800 people; she was shaking when answering the phone. I mean, I get it if I’m shaking because I lied, but I was blurting out the truth for God sake! I kept blabbering; ‘uhhhmmm’ was often said as much as I inhale. Ergh! The old me can tell you a story about some person’s life; a non-existence person while sounding like that person is my best friend! (not something that I should be proud of, but you get the point yeah)

She is becoming softer and more sensitive. I should get myself together. Gotta find that old Allya back (only the positive sides please). I love being pampered by people around me, but I should not delude myself. Okay, delude is not the word, but whatever xD

True, I love being treated like a woman, but I shouldn’t be mean to friends who didn’t treat me as such. It’s not their fault, they know the old Allya, not the new. So I can’t blame them for that. Regardless, I love all of my friends!

❤ ❤ ❤ Love you all lots! ❤ ❤ ❤

Tata~


P.S. I know this is a random thing to write. I just feel like writing, that’s all. Again, bear with me please xD

P.P.S. I am becoming too dependent on Pres as well. Before, everyone was depending on me; the ever so independent woman. Now, I’m disgusted at how much I depend on Pres. No offense Pres, none of them are your fault. I love being your VP, you treat me well and thanks to you, I get to experience being a follower, leaded by a great person. But gurl, you gotta get yourself together and rule on! Oppps, I mean live on~

Uhhhhmmm… What?

Hi hi~

So, I just finished doing the laundry at midnight. During the time I was doing the laundry, a story popped into my mind. It’s not really a story, or is it?

Now that I’m in front of my laptop, staring at this blank Word sheet, it’s all gone, thus that is the reason why I’m ranting about it here.

What was I supposed to write? It was interesting, I swear. All I remember was the intro of the should-be-this blog-post post.

I know, I know, I should post about the Darevolution AGM, but I must write about ……………………..

There, blank… Oh well, whatever, it’ll popped up someday, I hope. Maybe I’m too sleepy, so it’s hidden somewhere inside my currently tired brain…

Toodles, tata~

A blur

You know that feeling when your mind just stop working. I’m writing this while hoping that none of my housemates will read it. These past few months was hectic. My schedule was packed, with both studying and UFS’s matters. True, I’m a strong person mentally, but I think I’m reaching my limit.

If you read my earlier posts, you’ll know that I’m in the middle of my sem break. Although, there’s none for my housemates and I. It was fine, until now. We’re supposed to gather back at Kelana Jaya by next week and I’ve planned everything, but it just disappear. I was in a blur earlier, staring into the wall kind of blankness. Then, I started crying, sobbing like a little child whose candy has been taken away from her. In the middle of that emotional distress, I messaged a friend. I told that person about my sudden blur state, not knowing what to do.

Babbling about it, I stopped. Everyone have burdens, I don’t want to add my friends’ burdens; they have enough. Furthermore, I’m the one who jumped into the scene, knowing what I‘ll face ahead.

It happened while I was packing my luggage. I don’t know what to pack, heck, I don’t know what outfit I should wear next week. It got me thinking, what the hell am I doing right now? Why do I have to stay over at Kelana Jaya next week? Why can’t we just do it from our perspective home? Why? Why? Why? Endless whys.

Releasing my distress while writing this post, hoping that no one will read it; it calms me a bit.

Crazy it may sound, I think I need a break from everything. I need to see the doctor, need to spend more time being a college student. I want to act my age, without caring about anything but my pointers.

The last time I had a decent sleep was before I became the VP, am not complaining though, because I know that my Pres’s burdens are heavier. I promised myself not to add anything to his already-heavy-responsibility, but I guess I’m not strong enough. After this, I’ll have to be stronger, for everyone. That’s what I’ve been doing all my life, being strong, so what’s with the sudden breakdown?

Aaaah… I know… I think it’s because of my views. I haven’t see or being with any hot guys these days. Teheee~ Let’s lighten up the mood should we?

You gotta admit, hot guys are da bomb! Especially if they’re kind and hmmmm… I don’t care if they’re straight or not, as long as you’re an eye candy, then I’ll be fine. I’m not trying to be a hoe here; studies did show that handsome male lowers down female stress level.

Uhuuu, I just got a message from Pen’s gf, asking me to go out tomorrow. I think I’ll take on that offer. Gotta go outside and chill around, cuci mata~ Ceh, though Pen will probably come as well tomorrow, the chance of meeting new guys is going to be as thin as my patience.  Oh well, beggars cannot be choosers. Toodles world~

Tata~