Hi hi~

Amazing title, huh? Who in the world announced that they flunked their SPM (high school)?

Some may think my result is 50/50, but to me, it was bad.

Like, bad BAD.

I scored 3 A’s out of 10 subjects. Thankfully, I didn’t fail any subjects and my lowest mark is a C. Hmmm. I’m quite proud of that. Physic, C. YES!

Before I start, I took SPM back in 2015 which was two years ago. I don’t want to start the intro with the ending (which I’ve already did), so let’s go back to 2014; the time I had to choose my major.

I scored 6 A’s and 2 B’s for my PMR (middle school, we were the last batch of PMR candidates) and I know, it sounds bad, but I kinda ran away from the hospital the night before PMR. My mother, my sister and I were down with dengue. Mine was not as bad as my sister, probably, I mean, I’m alive and kicking, alhamdulillah.

All the paperwork was done for me to take the PMR at the hospital, bedridden, but hey, this is Allya we’re talking about here. I want to be with my friends! In the end, with the help of my grandma (who came all the way from Indonesia), I was able to sneak out from the hospital. Dramatic much?

Nah, I didn’t really sneak out. I forced my way out, legally. My dad did all the discharged procedures (a.k.a. paying a huge amount of money to the hospital as they woke-me-up-every-three-hours-to-check-my-conditions-but-ordered-me-to-sleep-and-get-more-rest). The point here is that I wasn’t allowed to be discharged yet, but smarty old me begged those nurses whom I kept calling to my room every now and then so that I have someone to talk to because Allya just can’t stop talking.

That night, I got a good night sleep in my own comfy bed, with no nurses coming back and forth to check my state of health (physically? Good. Mentally? Bad!) Although, my grandma probably didn’t sleep as much xD

In conclusion, I sat for PMR while being heavily drugged to prevent me from collapsing and to numb those under-the-skin itches. That is why I didn’t shed a single tear during the result announcement. During my UPSR (primary school) result announcement day, I cried a river. Pffft… Embarrassing, emotional Allya.

I was actually shocked that I scored that better-than-average result. Back then, most of my friends already went up the stage, while I was lounging around with an almost-crying Lesbong. During the 6 A’s result announcement, my name was called first, then Lesbong’s. If I knew about it, I would’ve dragged that girl along with me. She was a mess! Urrrghhh! After us were Dania and Fahmi (not sure about the order, I kinda forgot), while the rest is history.

Skip forward to January 2014. My second day as a high school student. We had to attend the three days orientation and on the second day, the teachers have assigned us to whatever major they think suits us best. Surprisingly, my name was on the ‘medical doctor’ class, the pure science class; the first class. Only Fahmi and I were the only one with results less than 7 A’s. We were allowed to change majors, and somehow, most of my friends from middle school (who scored less than 7 A’s) apply for the pure science major (they were assigned to the ‘engineer’ class, technical science class), but some of us from the pure science class wanted to be an art major student.

Guess what, we weren’t allowed to change. The reason? The pure science class will be empty (those who applied to pure science class from technical science class wanted to be with their friends. Don’t say that’s not the biggest reason, guys!) and our school will ended up being weird.

To summarize all that, we were actually forced to enter the pure science class. Nevertheless, we’re not blaming our teachers. I am not blaming my teachers. They put me in that class because they know I can excel in that field. I did, actually. I ranked in the top 5 ranking out of the whole school/batch. Unfortunately, that ended during my Form 4 final exams.

I took a break from school for a month. I didn’t do it for fun, I was sick.

My finals were a week after my one-month-sick break. Do you think I’ll study when I was down with such terrible sickness?! No! I did a Naruto marathon. From episode one to Shippuden episode hundred something. I learnt a lot from it, such an amazing anime, with lots of life lesson and A LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT of SHIPPING~ Done.

What kind of result do you expect me to get? A 10 out of 10. Hell naaa~ I don’t remember it… But I was still in the top 10 or 20… Whatever.

What I remember though, was my Chemistry result. Starting from the very first Chemistry exam until the last one before finals, my marks were top notch. Not a perfect 100%, but my mark was the highest one. Okay, maybe one of the highest one. Nope, I’m sticking with the highest one to make it more dramatic.

Guess, guess!!! Guess what I got for my Chemistry finals~~~~~~~~~~


A fail, GAGAL!

As much as I love the color red, I hate to see it on my report card. However, I don’t have a report card; a manual one. They’re all available online. So there’s no red pen marking whatsoever; just that annoying ‘G’ which means ‘gagal’ or fail.

My Chemistry teacher ignored me for months. She gave me the stink eye, cold shoulder. It’s my fault anyway, we’re okay now. I am just too adorable (persistent) to be ignored~

Neither did I know that it’ll be downhill from there, for my marks obviously, life was great!

My marks were tumbling down. I was one of my school’s hope, but it went down the drain; just like that. Especially during the SPM result announcement. Our results were so bad, I cried hysterically, not for me, but for my friends.

Now, every time people asked me on what I scored for SPM, most of them were shocked. I’m a dean list student on my campus. During my foundation year, my GPA and CGPA are almost a perfect 4.0; making people questioned my unbelievably bad SPM result.

Nope, I’m not the type to regret anything, as my past shaped me into who I am today. My SPM result is bad, true, but there’s nothing to be ashamed of it. Why you ask? Because I deserve that result.

My whole Form 5 year or my final year in high school was filled with anything but studying. I may be able to get a straight A if I studied, but meh. I have a goal that year and it was not to score well in SPM; it was to have the fun of my life, something I will never get to experience again.

A bad SPM result? You can just repeat it, or go on with your life. But missing out that last high school moment; that’s just sad. Don’t get me wrong, a good SPM result can help you on getting a scholarship and entering a good college, but no one ever tells you about all those fun that you’ll be missing out!

People will only talk about studying and getting a good result on your final year, but how about those good-times memories? Those memories that you can only make during your final moments as a school student. Those memories that you’ll be telling your children and grandchildren.

That is why, I didn’t regret my decision for making that year, all about playing around. I did study, but not much. I laze around more than I clean that 150cmx75cm dusty study table of mine.

My teachers will probably kill me if they read this post, but hey, at least I’m a 4-flat student now! Almost, 4-flat student and most of my friends are dean’s list-ers as well.

I don’t know about the others, but the reason why I got a decent result during my foundation year was because I’m taking something that I want. No one was forcing me to take whatever course they chose, I am the one living my life, so I will decide on which course I’ll take. As I am stepping into a new territory, the only thing I’m familiar about is studying. That’s why I studied, a bit, tehee.

To those who are taking SPM, don’t stress on studying. Be free, rebel, hang out with your friends, and savor those everyday, normal occurrences. A little high school drama here and there can spice up your life; don’t worry, unless you’re just childish, it’ll be nothing but a sweet, stupid memory later on. Study smart, not hard. I used to find that saying ridiculous, but hey, study when you want, don’t force it. Don’t do your homework if you don’t want to, just rest and relax. Unless your teacher is a psychopath, the worse that can happen is being spanked by a cane. Done that, did that. I skipped doing my homework so much; I’ve tasted all kinds of punishments. Aaaah, such memories.

As for those who are waiting for their SPM result, do not worry. Benda dah jadi. It’s not like you can turn back time. Pray to God and leave it to Him to decide, as you’ve did all the effort. If you’re blessed with an amazing result, alhamdulillah, but if not, do not worry, your life is not over yet! There are a lot of other options out there, I’ll be more specific on a different post. Just remember, you’ve done it all. Whether you did your best, or your worst, just like Elsa from Frozen sang, the past is in the past♫♪♪ Don’t forget about the memories you made during that one whole year. No matter how bad it is, there must be some good in it.

This post is getting too long xD I’ll end it here. In the end, I am not ashamed of my ‘flunked’ SPM result, though I am also not proud of it. However, the things, the memories, the life that I experience while not making studying my first priorities are irreplaceable. Things that I did with my decade-long friends and my we-just-met-for-a-year friends are not only in my mind but also my heart. The good ol’ days.


P.S. This is my personal opinion based on my own experience. I’m not judging anyone nor am I dissing SPM. It wasn’t easy for me to make that kind of decision as well. Being an Indonesian living in Malaysia, I always tried my best, not wanting for my country to be dissed. But sometimes, you just got to be selfish and do what you want, as long as you think it through; the pros and the cons.


Heroine Shikkaku~

Translated, its Disqualified Heroine or Rejected Heroine in English. I read the manga when I was younger. Well not really that young, I was 14/15 ish back then. It was a sweet manga, but I haven’t finish reading it because it took the translator a long time to translate it… Aaaaah… The pain of waiting for a translation, heck there’s a complete manga that I have been waiting since I was 10, but it’s English translations are still incomplete. True, I learnt Japanese before, but my kanji and katana are bad. Capital B.A.D.

Back to the story, so I just found out that they made a movie spin-off. IT WAS SO GOOD! Heck, it’s one of the best movie-based-from-manga spin-off I’ve ever watch! The actors and actresses were so into characters, the props, lightings! Aaaaaaaaaaah!!!

Though I don’t want to blabber about the movie’s qualities, I want to share about the plots.

Taken from Asianwiki,

’Hatori Matsuzaki is a female high school student. She has a crush on her childhood friend Rita Terasaka and believes he will eventually choose her as her heroine, but Rita Terasaka begins dating Miho Adachi. Meanwhile, the most popular male student, Kosuke Hiromitsu takes an interest in Hatori Matsuzaki.’

Basically, Hatori loves Rita and vice versa, but they’re too scared to confess their love. I gotta, admit, I prefer Hatori to be with Kosuke, but oh well~

When Rita got his first girlfriend, Miho Adachi, Hatori was thinking about 101 ways to get rid of her. Sounds cruel, but she’s an idiot, so yeah. Even from the very beginning, I never liked Adachi, acting all weak and innocent; the worst evil creature on earth! True, Hatori was mean in a stupid way at first, but she’s an angel at heart. Letting go of the boy that she likes, putting on a happy façade, feeling happy as long as Rita is happy.

The plot twist was during the bon odori, the firework festival.

During the firework festival, I feel you Hatori.
I. AM. GOING. TO. SAY. THAT. Pfttt.. Liar, you’ll pee in your pants before you say it, Allya.

Hatori confessed, both her and Rita kissed. It’s a krik krik situation, considering Rita was still dating Adachi, but hey, I won’t judge. They held hands throughout the whole night. It was fun, until Adachi the serpent ruins everything the next day.

The evil b*tch! Acting all weak. Hellloooo! Can’t you be independent, so not worth my time.

Fortunately for Hatori, Kosuke came to the rescue, drenched in rain ❤ ❤ ❤ He helped her to climb out from that deep dug pit and give her all the loves she needs.

Bla bla bla, Rita stayed with Adachi while Hatori dated Kosuke. Again, it was a fun time, until their school trip. Finally, Adachi confessed her wrong doings to Rita and Hatori told Kosuke about where her heart really lies on.

Hatori went to meet Rita and vice versa, they met and voila~ They live happily ever after.

My summary sucks, but it left a deep impression in my heart.

If you know me, or have been reading my old blog, you’ll know that I like Syamiel for 7 years. Ooops, Allya have no shame now admitting to that because yeah, it’s all in the past~ I read the manga during the time where well, I don’t know. In conclusion, I don’t get the manga at first, like why the hell would you wanna do that Hatori?! I get the I-am-happy-as-long-as-he-is-happy part, but WHY ARE YOU NOT ACCEPTING KOSUKE? And WHY ARE YOU KISSING SOMEONE ELSE’S BOYFRIEND? For God sake, it was an alien concept for me.

Pffft… As I get older a.k.a. now, I kinda understand Hatori. She’s been in love with the guy for a decade and suddenly some random chick stole him from her. Like hallloooooo, she basically raised the guy. Now I understand how mothers around the world feel.

Why is she not leaning towards Kosuke in the beginning? Well, the heart wants what it wants. You can’t force yourself to love someone. If you’re lucky, it’ll end well, but if not… It’s going to be painful.

Personally, for me, the greatest form of love (love between lovers and not family) will be staying happy even when you were hurt. Okay that doesn’t make sense. What I’m trying to say here is that, one-sided love is the strongest type of love, especially if you love that someone one-sidedly for a long period of time. Listen to that Mielly, you should be proud that someone like me loved you like that before ;P

Loving someone unconditionally even when that someone doesn’t even know your existence. Being happy for his happiness. It saddens you, no, just like how a vampire is killed, seeing him smiling, loving another girl feels like someone just stab you in the chest with a stake. Ouh, dear God the pain is unbearable, but it’s okay because he is happy. Call it stupid, but hey, to all people out there who have been through a one-sided love, they will get me.

I promised myself to tell the next person who I will love openly, with full confidence, barge head on with your feelings. Meh, bullshit. It doesn’t work that way. I gave out a lot of love advices, but look at me, I learnt from mangas, animes and dramas. Haks. I may have all the confidence of the world, but when it comes to love, I suck, BIG TIME. From high-level-until-it-reached-the-sky-even-through-the-outer-space kind of confidence, when it comes to love, my confidence will be at the most inner part of the earth surface thingy.

True, I am not that average looking, but when I’m in love, I feel like I’m the ugliest girl ever lived. I can’t even look at the person who I like. Heck, I can’t even look at Syamiel before; I’ll ran off even when he’s 1km away. Though look at us now, staring contest is our favourite kind of contest because I will always win~

Forget blusher, my cheeks are always glowing red. Errgh! Why are you like that Allya?! Now it makes me cringe, whenever I remember the past me who were in love with Syamiel. Aduuuuh. Maluuu. Allya iz zo ztupidz.

Aaaaah… The good old days where love was in the air. Where love was not that complicated. My pure love. Ahaks. One more thing, Mielly dear, sorry that I kept mentioning your name. I mean, you’re the only one I have ever liked, so yeah… Bear with me, or find me a hot young billionaire for a chance 😉

To wrap things up, this movie taught me a lot about love. Even when Rita founds out that Adachi tricked him, he still thanked her. It shows that respect is a must-have quality in everyone. As for Adachi, she forgave Rita and also Hatori, when they kissed. Kosuke, striving and changing into a better person for the girl he loves, but keep on being better even after being dumped by her.

Lastly, our heroine, Hatori, stupid idiot for not confessing earlier. Padan muka you lose Rita for a while, your mistake. Though in the same time, great woman, loving someone whole-heartedly without getting anything in return except for heartache. Stupid, for kissing someone’s boyfriend, but bravely confessing her feelings. Going for what she wants, not caring about the world, Atta girl!

Rita’s words to Hatori when he finally confessed,

“Are you fine with that? I’m empty, you know, I’ve always hurt you, I am coward too.”

Kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!! So sweeeeeeeeeet!!! Diabetes!!!!!! Kena potong kaki!!!!!!!!!!! ❤

Funny, romantic, idioticly stupid and reality. Heroine Shikkaku is worth the watch!

I guess that is all for my ‘review’ about the movie. Not really worth the read, but hey, I just love writing about my thoughts~


P.S. If you realized it, I kept using the word ‘like’ and not ‘love’ when it comes to Syamiel. For me, love is something I can say to everyone I love. My family, friends, adorable cute things. But for ‘like’, it’s a heavy coated word. ‘Like’ means a great form of love towards someone-who-I want-to-be-with-for-the-rest-of-my-life kinda word. Currently, Mielly is the only receiver of the word, haks. YOU SHOULD BE PROUD SHEIKH MUHAMMAD SYAMIEL KHUZAIFAH. You were liked by me, Allya the Great! Hahahahahahaha xD He is soooo going to kill me if he reads my blog. Teheee~ Ingat aku kesah :p

P.P.S. Below are some of my fav lines~

Every girl needs a Kosuke in her life! I wanna put the kabe-don scene, but I can’t because my wordpress is the normal plan TT^TT Google it!!! The kabe-don scene! I died! ❤ ❤ ❤
When Hatori ‘gave up’ on Rita xD

The first photo is the perfect description of girls friendship. Boys, we do share every single small details that you probably notice; it doesn’t exist. Or do they? Because girls confused you a lot xD And the second photo is the type of friend I am. You hurt my friend? I’ll torture you, not to death, because you’ll feel no pain after death.

Yezzzzzzzaaaaaaa!!! Each one of us is the main character in our own life! We should not try to be others because hey, everyone is different.


I just finished watching Naruto Shippuden episode 473, where Team 7 works together to defeat Kaguya.

I cried. Like pillow-is-wet kind of cry. You may think that I’m exaggerating but there’s a reason why.

I first watched Naruto when I was 7/8 and that is when I first met my friends who are still my friends now.

Tik tok tik tok a decade has past.

Naruto has ended (he becomes hokage. Everyone got married, got children, all grown up) and now we are not together anymore; my friends and I. It’s weird you know, not being able to see someone you see everyday everyday anymore. We can still meet each other yes, but that too is hard.

Truthfully, I don’t miss school. At all.

Though I miss hearing them screaming, playing, joking around.

I don’t miss waking up early in the morning or sleeping late but I do miss the moment where those gloomy mornings become bright by seeing them. Not being able to sleep well but feeling energized seeing your friends’ behavior.

I’ve tried not to get too attached to them since I know nothing is forever but it was hard. We grew up together, play together, get punished together, heck even going through puberty together (remember those ugly days guys. We are not cute potatoes, you gotta admit. We were freaking ugly. At least some of us were).


Since the first time I saw them; they’ve now grown into fine young men and women.

Dah boleh jadi mak and ayah orang dah 😀

I’ve realized that my friends meant a lot to me after I started watching Naruto again when I was in form 4.

Who says that Anime teaches you nothing?

I do know that I won’t be here if it weren’t for them. I’m a foreigner but they still treat me with respect and never once they used my citizenship against me. I’ve got a few Indonesian friends and they aren’t as lucky as I was.

I have great friends, great school and great teachers. They backed me up if something happens. They tried to put me in any activities existed even though they know I am not allowed to enter (since I’m a foreigner).

They fought through hardships with me, for me.


Trust me, I wouldn’t be standing there, on the stage getting a huge reward if it weren’t for all of them.

That’s that. Another thing that I realize after watching Naruto is we are soon going to be the old generation.

We used to be children, new generation. Now, our era is almost over; we’re going to have children of our own soon.

We will not be following examples anymore but we have to give them out. To the new generation.

I know that people may think I’m stupidly dramatic for thinking about such things when I was only 16. But hey, it is true.

We are not getting any younger.

We’ll become the old generation once we have children of our own. Even if we don’t have one of our own, we will still be one when we start working.

We have to get our certificate then work. When we work, we are the one building the world. We may have to start from the bottom but everyone successful is not spoon fed.

We have to give great examples to them (new gen).

Gotta show them that mistakes are good but make sure it’s not often.

Gotta show them that life can be cruel but when you have the right people with you; it’s bearable.

Gotta make them feel save, protected, loved.

Our predecessors have not done a really good job and we should all learn from it. Though we are still called the new gen; we need to start changing to be a better person now!

There will always be flaws as we are not God but at least let’s make this world a better place for our future children and grandchildren (or we can just leave that to our children :P).

Our era is near (its ending and beginning). We are the successor to the world we are living in now. It (the world) may not be that great but I guess our predecessors think it is good enough already -_-“

That is one hell of a rambling thanks to Naruto sappy episode xD




Naruto is what?!

Okay, for your information, I’m an avid otaku. People tend to disbelieve that since my daily nature shows other wise. What is that suppose to mean -_-

So, as you all know(let’s just say that we’re all Naruto fans), Naruto and Hinata (my main OTP <3) have 2 children together. A boy and a girl. Basically everyone from the old generation have children and these children are called the new generation.

This and that, years have passed since Boruto The Movie (Naruto world) and guess what, a new manga serialization about Boruto is out. Though it’s not written by Kishi; he is the main supervisor.

People were complaining about the new art style (especially Sasuke’s hair). Though personally, I don’t really mind it; It’s not as good as Kishi but hey, everyone’s hand is different.

Back to the topic. I first read about the spoilers in Tumblr. They said that Naruto and Hinata will die and bla bla bla. I don’t believe it as I haven’t see any of the manga spoiler.

I told my friend who is an avid fan about it a.k.a. Danial when suddenly a notification popped up and I accidentally clicked it.

Voila~ It was the newest Boruto manga (in Korean). I sent it to Danial and then read the manga myself.

My korean is not that good so I can only figure some words but I didn’t find anything that shows Naruto will die. Still, I’m in shock (obsessed fan remember). I can’t really remember what I told Danial (I’m too lazy to take my iPad; its upstairs) but I do remember complaining about it. It goes something like this:-

Peeeeeeeeeeeen!!!! (Pen=Danial) What the heck is this?! Like, Naruto can’t die! That’s just absurd!

He answered me back by saying that it was a good thing as it can increase the market sales. That evil creature! How could he?!

Like dia tak sedih ke? I’ve been watching Naruto since I was 7 but stopped thanks to the scene where Sasuke abandon Sakura. Years have past and in 2014, my cousin dear, Salma/ Ame forced me to watched it. I was reluctant at first but since I was suffering from chicken pox and dengue after that (I didn’t went to school for like a month); thus I was bored af so I decided to watched it. And heck my finals result were soooo bad that my Chemist teacher ignored me until like, 3-4 months later xD

Sadly, that result stays until my SPM xD


I strayed off too much. While everyone has been saying that Naruto is dead or will die (I’ve read the Eng ver.), I don’t think he will.

Remember the time when everyone was saying that Naruto will die in Boruto The Movie? Yeah, I think that it’ll be like that (I hope TT^TT) Maybe Naruto was sent of to some other dimension, again.

Just from the first page we can see that Boruto must have been freaking strong. Well, at least he looks strong. But how can he not? Just list the people who became his sensei.

Kawaki vs Boruto battle in Konoha

As for Boruto’s Byakugan, some said that Hinata probably die too while protecting Naruto and some even said that Himawari gave her eyes or something (this fandom love angst too much).

I think, I repeat, I THINK, my PERSONAL opinion on this is that maybe Hiashi died and gave his eyes to his grandson. MAYBE.

Or maybe Hanabi gave her eyes. Again, MAYBE. But I hope that Boruto got it from Toneri because he felt indebted to Boruto’s parents. I hope that this is a yes. Aamiin~

I’m depressed now. Like you can’t die Nardooooooo!!! Nor anyone else at that!!!!! This is why I wish that Naruto wouldn’t have a continuation. The old generations are getting old. Someone will probably die right TT^TT

I am too quite disappointed at the manga. Like, I don’t need a manga version of Boruto The Movie, y’know -_-

Oh well lah.

Though this is my fav part from the manga xD

Temari and Ino must have been one hell of a mom xD